To beat writer's block and also just for fun, I like to do automatic writing exercises (also called psychography or trance writing). Here are some of the weirdest things to come out of my subconscious from one-word prompts.


Purple is a dumb camera. It waxes and wanes and shows you who you really are. It's Alex from the Monkees. It's a monkey that never gives up. Giving up is for suckers.


Don't ever stop the moo. Don't ever stop the who. You are grace and you are petty and you are goo in my mouth.


The sun came out today. It showed me who I really am. I'm a bee. A big, fat buzzing bee. A bee taped together by anguish and Cheetos. Man, wouldn't it be good to be a Cheeto on a boat in the rain?


Blue is the vessel in which I keep my spare keys. Blue is the color of God in a wheelchair. Blue is the color of omniscience. Blue is the color that never taught you how to Tango. Let's head to the sawdust and never look back.


Hello bullet. I'm feeling whimsical today. Let's talk about astrology. Let's talk about feeling awesome all the time. I want you to join me on this journey of death and love and locks of hair. You taste like flowers in the field of great gab.